Where Sisterhood Meets Strategy: 5 Takeaways from AAHOA HerOwnership 2025

Last week, I walked into AAHOA’s HerOwnership Conference on Hilton Head Island wearing a different hat than I had in years past. As someone who helped create this initiative during my time at AAHOA, I've always experienced it from the inside.

But now, attending as an independent voice in the industry, I experienced it from a different perspective. As we know, a new vantage point has a way of bringing about additional clarity. 

And honestly? This sisterhood continues to become something even more beautiful than we originally envisioned. Overall, it felt less like a business event and more like... well, like hanging out with your most ambitious friends who happen to run hotels.

AAHOA's Laura Lee Blake was kind enough to acknowledge my presence at the opening, a small gesture that truly touched me. It reminded me why we started in the first place: to create space for all women in hospitality.

I walked away with my cup filled… and so many takeaways and moments of magic. But these five insights are some that I won’t stop thinking about – life lessons that apply whether you're running a property or just trying to figure out your next career move.

1. Build Your Own Board of Directors

Helen Zaver, Executive Vice President, Colliers Hotels, dropped a truth bomb that made me immediately start going through my mental rolodex: Companies have boards to guide strategy and provide accountability. We all should, too.

Think about it. When you're facing a big decision or stuck on a challenge, who do you turn to? If our answer is "I figure it out myself" or "I complain to my partner over dinner," we’re missing out on something huge.

I've started thinking about who's on my personal board. My former colleague who always gives it to me straight. That powerhouse peer who's two steps ahead in her career. The mentor who asks the questions I don't want to answer but need to hear. They're already there. I just hadn't been intentional about leveraging their wisdom or the way I look at them relative to myself. 

Takeaway: Curate your circle of mentors, peers, and truth-tellers who can guide your decisions and growth.

2. Visibility and Exposure Beat Flawless Execution

Lan Elliott, Co-Founder & Principal at Acacia Holdings, reminded us of the classic Winston Churchill quote: "Perfection is the enemy of progress." But she added her own twist to the follow up.

How many opportunities have we all missed because we were still polishing? Still preparing? Still waiting for the "right" moment when we'd have all our ducks in a row?

Lan emphasized to do your job well, but it all doesn’t have to be perfect. It’s your image and exposure that you should focus on, that your reputation gets built on consistency and presence, not on having every detail perfect.

And frankly, most people are too busy worrying about their own stuff to scrutinize yours as closely as you think they are.

Takeaway: People remember who shows up, not who shows up perfectly.

3. Our "Weakness" Might Actually Be a Superpower

Rohit Mathur, CEO of Bridge Marketplace, shared data that surprised me: women on his platform close more deals than men because they’re more prepared, methodical, and organized.

Wait… these are things we sometimes apologize for? The detailed prep work, the thorough follow-up, the organized approach that some people call "overthinking"? These are actually competitive advantages.

It made me realize how often we apologize for our natural strengths or try to change them to fit some other model of success. What if instead we leaned in harder? What if being methodical and prepared wasn't something to downplay but something to amplify?

Takeaway: What we downplay as “overthinking” may be our greatest advantage.

4. Seek Help, But Be Strategic

Davonne Reaves, Founder & CEO at Vesterr, got real about something we don't talk about enough: Momentum comes when you seek help… but not all help is good help.

She asked what PR professionals we had in the room, and I begrudgingly raised my hand, not sure what she was going to say next. But her advice was spot on: Her personal brand took off once she leveraged professional help, but advised attendees to really know who you’re hiring and what you’re getting for your investment. 

And as someone who now helps others grow their brand, I wholeheartedly agree. Do your homework. Ask for references. Start small before making big commitments. 

Takeaway: Vet carefully, and trust your instincts when building partnerships.

5. Innovation Needs Every Voice at the Table

One of the most memorable stories came from Dr. Amy Diehl. She reminded us that sometimes the simplest ideas take decades to catch on because decision-makers can’t see past their own lens.

She told the story of the rolling suitcase. Though Anita Willets-Burnham, an American artist, invented the idea in 1928, it didn’t become mainstream until the late 1980s. Why? Industry leaders (mostly men at the time) believed no “real man” would roll a suitcase, and that women didn’t travel alone, so they wouldn’t need it. Gender stereotypes delayed a world-changing innovation by more than 50 years.

Her point hit hard: when decisions are made through one perspective, progress stalls. When you broaden the table, innovation thrives.

Takeaway: Bringing more voices into a room is about unlocking solutions that serve everyone.

Guiding the Way and Illuminating the Path

The HerOwnership Conference reminded me that leadership is about staying open to learning and applying what you’ve learned in real time. The challenge for all of us now is to put these insights into action. Build your board. Show up before you’re “perfect.” Lean into your natural strengths. Choose your partners wisely. Broaden the table. Because every time we practice what we’ve learned, we illuminate our own path and make it brighter for those who follow. 

Heather Carnes

Heather Carnes is Director and Founder of Carnes Agency, a boutique marketing, PR, and branding firm serving the hospitality industry. An award-winning communicator and former EVP of Communications and Chief Strategy Officer at AAHOA, Heather brings nearly 20 years of experience in strategic communications, marketing, and brand development. Learn more at CarnesAgency.com.