Quiet Power, Big Impact: Women Talk Ambition on Their Terms

Our second hertelier LinkedIn Live delivered big: real talk, global perspectives, and refreshing honesty about what ambition really looks like for women in hospitality. Despite a tech glitch knocking me out––because what’s a LinkedIn Live without a little drama?––hertelier co-founder, Nancy Mendelson, flew solo like a pro, guiding a dynamic conversation with powerhouse panelists Jennifer Fox and Nicki Dehler. Jennifer, an international hospitality executive and former President of Fairmont Hotels & Resorts, and Nicki, SVP of Product at Stayntouch, opened up about career twists, leadership truths, and how ambition shifts as you grow.  

Watch and/or listen to the full conversation on LinkedIn.  Here are some key takeaways:

Ambition Isn’t Always Linear...or Glamorous

In sharing the early days of her career journey, Jennifer got candid about one of her biggest career leaps, leaving behind a fabulous single life in Sydney to move to Alice Springs.

“I didn’t want to move to Alice Springs, but I really wanted to join ITT Sheraton... I found it very difficult to get on that plane. But it changed my life.”

That move fast-tracked her international career and eventually led her to lead one of the most iconic hotel brands in the world. Not bad for a role she almost didn’t take. It’s a reminder that ambition sometimes demands detours... and those seemingly off-track moves can catapult a career.

Nicki shared her own pivot moment, from hotel operations into tech, sparked by curiosity and a behind-the-scenes look at a PMS changeover.

“I hadn’t studied IT. But I was fascinated. I just wanted to get better every day.”

Her quiet drive to understand systems and improve operations led her to help launch one of the most widely used hospitality tech platforms in the world.

Ambition Can Be Quiet and Still Be Powerful

While neither Jennifer nor Nicki were explicitly raised to be ambitious, they both say their drive was rooted in work ethic and a desire to grow.

Nicki shared, “Everyone is different. Some people are loud, others are quiet. Quiet ambition is still ambition.” “It’s about pursuing your goals in a way that’s authentic to you.”

Jennifer echoed that, while she wasn’t coached to chase a high-flying career, she always had an internal push to excel... and a willingness to go where opportunity lived.

Culture Shapes Ambition

Both leaders have worked across the globe, navigating different cultural expectations of women in leadership.

Reflecting on her early career, Jennifer shared, “I used to set rules for myself when I traveled with men. I wouldn’t let them carry my suitcase or pay for drinks. I wanted to be seen as an equal, not someone who needed looking after.”

“Japan was one of the most challenging but rewarding places I worked,” Nicki added. “Cultural nuance teaches you to slow down and listen more... and it makes you a better leader.”

From Australia to Hong Kong, Hawaii to Germany, both women have seen how ambition is interpreted differently across regions... and how building cross-cultural awareness can shape stronger, more inclusive leadership.

Ambition ≠ Aggression

We talked about the infamous “double bind” that still lingers. Confident men are assertive. Confident women are... bitchy.  

“Assertiveness is not a bad thing.” Jennifer emphasized this point in response to how ambition is often misunderstood. “It’s how you deliver with purpose and respect. Some people will never evolve past the stereotypes. That’s their problem.”

For Nicki, leadership isn’t about power. “Leadership for me isn’t about being the boss,” she explained. “It’s about guiding a team with care, trust, and shared purpose.”

Their advice? Don’t change your tone. Change the game. Ambition doesn’t have to mean dominating a room. It can mean leading with empathy, creating safe cultures, and getting results without losing your values.

Burnout Happens... But It Can Be Prevented

Both women acknowledged the intensity of global roles, long-haul travel, and the pressure of trying to "do it all."

“I never had kids, but I had a husband who was alone for 280 days a year,” Jennifer said. “You need to love what you do, or the exhaustion catches up with you.”

Nicki was candid about boundaries. “You can't do everything,” she noted. “I picked the two things I care most about: my family and my job. The rest doesn’t have to be perfect.”

Their advice? Delegate. Protect your time. Travel smarter. Prioritize wisely.

And above all, enjoy the work. Jennifer offered a simple but powerful truth: “If you don’t love the job going into it, you won’t love it once you’re there.”

Mentors (and Anti-Mentors) Matter

Both credited strong (mostly male) mentors who pushed them into stretch roles. But they also agreed that the worst bosses can be just as educational.

“I’ve learned just as much from people who showed me what not to do.” Jennifer reflected on how poor leadership shaped her own approach. “Those are lessons that stick with you.”

Nicki added that she found a mentor later in her career and wished she had one earlier. It would’ve helped when the path forward felt unclear.

Ambition Evolves

Jennifer now serves on several  boards and mentors emerging leaders. Nicki is focused on refining and growing the Stayntouch platform she helped build from the ground up.

“I’m not chasing titles anymore.” Nicki spoke to how her ambition has evolved. “I’m focused on product excellence and helping my team grow.”

For Jennifer, the focus has shifted, as well. “It’s about purpose now,” she shared. “Working with companies I believe in and mentoring the next generation... that’s my ambition.”

Ambition, in this new chapter, looks a lot like impact. Measured not by position, but by the people you lift up, and the legacy you shape.

Best Advice: What These Leaders Want You to Know

“Embrace ambition without fear. Go for it.” That was Jennifer’s advice to women everywhere. “Even if you're only 90% ready, take the leap.”

Nicki wrapped it up with a final gem: “You don’t have to be loud to be ambitious.” “Find your own way and trust that it counts.”

Learned so much from these two inspiring #sheroes! Want more? You can watch the full conversation on LinkedIn... and stay tuned for our next hertelier LinkedIn Live coming soon!