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Male Ally of the Month: Paul McDonald on Confidence, Culture, and Creating Real Change at The Dorchester Collection
- Emily Goldfischer
- Jul 30, 2025
- 4 min read
Paul McDonald’s journey to leadership didn’t follow the usual itinerary. Growing up in a northern England mining town, he set his sights on the skies, and ended up shaping the culture of some of hospitality’s most iconic hotels. At the OutThere Icons of Inclusion event, Paul shared how his dream took flight and why he’s using his platform to drive real change. For July, he’s hertelier’s "Male Ally of the Month." His story begins not in a boardroom, but in a small town near Durham, where a single holiday sparked a dream that would change his life...
The Confidence to Dream
Growing up near Durham during the Thatcher years, Paul’s world felt far removed from luxury hospitality. But a childhood holiday changed everything. Spotting a Virgin Atlantic crew in the airport, he turned to his mother and asked, “Can men do this job?” Her cautious yes lit a spark that never went out. It wasn’t easy to get in, there was no internet, no contacts, and his first application was rejected (several times) but Paul didn’t give up. He started with smaller airlines, built his confidence, and eventually landed at Virgin Atlantic, where he would spend over a decade.
When Acceptance Took Flight
Once at Virgin, Paul discovered the link between confidence and belonging. “No one cared who I dated or how I identified. It was about taking care of customers,” he told the audience. That freedom, he explained, was life-changing. Early on, during training, a colleague asked him outright if he was gay. Until that moment, Paul hadn’t said the words out loud. “I told her, no, I’m bisexual,” he recalled with a smile. “And she just looked at me and said, no, you’re gay.” It wasn’t said unkindly — it was simply matter-of-fact. And in that moment, he realised it was OK to admit it, even to himself. That honesty gave him the confidence to thrive without hiding who he was. It proved that confident brands are built by confident people, and that confidence comes when employees feel safe enough to bring their whole selves to work.
Visibility Is a Responsibility
When Paul moved into hotels with Shangri-La, his understanding of inclusion deepened. One day the executive housekeeper, a colleague from Hungary, called him and said there was an employee who wanted to speak with him. “I assumed I’d be meeting a young man in his twenties,” Paul recalled. “Instead, a gentleman in his forties walked into my office, sat down, and simply asked, how do you find it being a gay man in this industry?”
What followed wasn’t a formal HR meeting, just a heartfelt conversation about Paul’s own life and experiences. “I didn’t think I’d said anything particularly profound,” Paul admitted, “but for him, it meant everything.” Later, Paul’s partner reminded him why: “He told me, now you’re an HR director, people will look to you.” That conversation cemented Paul’s belief that being visible as a gay leader wasn’t just personal, it was a responsibility. From then on, he worked more actively on policies and initiatives to ensure colleagues from all backgrounds felt seen, supported, and able to thrive.
Turning Values into Policy
Joining The Dorchester Collection felt like a natural next step. “Respect, working together, personality—those values felt like home,” Paul told the audience. He was drawn to the authenticity of the brand’s We Care philosophy, which puts diversity, inclusion, and belonging at the heart of both employee and guest experience. “It wasn’t about a campaign once a year. It was something genuinely lived, day to day.”
Paul is particularly proud of the age diversity across the team, noting that alongside apprentices just starting their careers, the Dorchester has nine employees aged 66 to 75. “It’s about creating a confident future for everyone, not just the next wave of talent,” he explained. That inclusive approach has helped earn the Dorchester Collection a place on The Sunday Times 100 Best Places to Work list for 2024, including a Top Ten ranking and recognition as one of the best employers for staff aged 55 and older, as well as a Gold Award from Stonewall for LGBTQ+ inclusion.
Real Change, Not Just Rhetoric
For women, the impact is especially clear. Beyond celebratory campaigns, The Dorchester has taken real action with inclusivity and anti-harassment training for all leaders, return-to-work support, menopause awareness initiatives, and proactive recruitment programs that open doors for underrepresented talent. “It’s not enough to put up a campaign for International Women’s Day,” Paul explained. “We revise policies. We make changes that last.”
He also stressed the importance of education led by people with lived experience. During International Women’s Week, for example, the Dorchester invited external speakers to share their perspectives, a move Paul said had a “huge impact” on how senior leaders understood the challenges faced by women in the workforce. As he put it, “diversity and inclusion are the infrastructure of trust. Without that, you can’t have a confident brand or confident people.”
Paul was quick to add that the work is never finished. “I don’t believe anyone can ever say they’ve cracked everything. It isn’t possible, especially as the world keeps changing.”
Allyship in Action
Paul closed his talk with a mantra that sums up both his leadership and his allyship: “At the end of the day, I ask myself, am I making people’s lives easier? If the answer is yes, then I know I’m building a confident future.” It’s a simple question with a big impact, and a reminder to leaders everywhere that allyship is measured in action, not intentions.
“At the end of the day, I ask myself, am I making people’s lives easier? If the answer is yes, then I know I’m building a confident future.”
That mindset — and the policies he has championed — make Paul McDonald not only a standout leader but also hertelier’s Mr. July!!
