The Best Mom-isms from Hospitality's Sharpest Minds: Wisdom That Built Careers

This is my mom, Jeanne, and me at her 95th birthday last year. On June 3rd, she'll turn 96. (Yes, you read that right.)

If you want to know where I get my energy, my drive, and my belief that women can build something meaningful at any age — look no further. My mom is the original hertelier in my life.

She's also the source of one line I've been hearing my whole life: "This too shall pass."

Bad day at work? This too shall pass. Heartbreak in your twenties? This too shall pass. Toddler meltdown in aisle four? This too shall pass. It's the kind of wisdom that sounds simple until you actually need it — and then it's the only thing that works. At 95-going-on-96, she's had a lot of practice being right about this.

So this Mother's Day, with my mom's words echoing in my head (and her birthday around the corner), I asked the hertelier community a question on LinkedIn: What's the best line you ever got from your mom?

The responses were better than I could have imagined. Hospitality leaders — women running hotel development, revenue strategy, PR, marketing, and entire properties — opened up about the one-liners that shaped how they show up at work, in negotiations, in tough conversations, and in life.

The New York Times ran a similar piece last week, with thousands of beautiful submissions. But what struck me about ours is that these mom-isms came from women building careers in one of the most demanding industries in the world. The advice isn't just sweet. It's actionable.

Here are the best of them, sorted for whatever kind of day you're having.

When you need to remember who you are

"Don't be a second-rate banana when you're a first-rate peach." Shared by Tiffany Cooper, Head of Development Americas, Mandarin Oriental Hotel Group

The undisputed champion of the thread. Stop trying to be a diminished version of something you're not. Lead with your strengths.

"Never shrink yourself to fit the room — walk in knowing you belong there." Shared by Katie Howard, Executive Hiring Leader & Career Coach (a dad-ism, but too good to leave out)

"Stand up for yourself. Don't settle." Shared by Emily Johnson, VP, Hotel Development

When you're about to lose it

"Eat first. Then solve the problem." Shared by Surbhi Jain

Honestly one of the most underrated strategic frameworks in business. Hungry decisions are bad decisions.

"This army runs on its stomach — always pack snacks." Shared by Melissa Benhaim

A theme is clearly emerging.

When you're spiraling

"You can get happy in the same pants you got mad in." Shared by Misty Belles, VP Global Public Relations, Virtuoso

The line that will live rent-free in your head. You don't need a fresh start to change your mood — you just need to choose to.

"Things are usually much less dramatic than they seem at first." Shared by Susan Barry, Hive Marketing & Top Floor Podcast

"There is always a solution. Sometimes it just takes a little bit longer to crystallise." Shared by Jutta Moore, Revenue Management Consultant

"This too shall pass." From my own mom — and apparently a lot of yours too.

When you're hesitating on something big

"You never know." Shared by Susan Barry

Susan's mom meant: travel now. Do the thing now. Susan's parents and godparents had grand retirement travel plans — and then her godfather was diagnosed with Parkinson's. They never got to take the trips. Take the trips.

"You know what's best for you, better than anyone else does." Shared by Kasia Dietz — what her mom told her when she quit her job in 2007 to travel the world for a year

"Better embarrassing than boring." Shared by Stephanie Fisher, Four Hundred

Words to live by.

When you need to remember to be a good human

"If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything." Shared by Agnelo Fernandes — who also lives by Mother Teresa's "If you judge people, you have no time to love them"

"Be polite, be respectful, and say thank you." Shared by Brian Proctor

"Be kind — it doesn't cost you anything." Shared by Melissa Benhaim

"It's nice to be nice." Shared by Sarah McCay Tams (and now passed down to her daughter)

When you're playing it too safe

"Bite off more than you can chew — then learn to chew it." Shared by Anne Golden, General Manager

If that's not the energy we all need going into the next quarter, I don't know what is.

When you're tempted to phone it in

"Always be very well dressed, even if you're just going to the neighborhood grocery store. People form their first impression of you based on your outfit." Shared by Awa Diakhate, Boutique & Independent Hotel Consultant

A timeless reminder that details matter, everywhere, all the time.

What it all adds up to

Reading through dozens of responses, a few themes kept surfacing — wisdom that crosses generations, geographies, and roles:

• Take care of yourself first. (Eat the snack. Take the nap. Put on the lipstick.)

• Be kind, but don't be a doormat. (Stand up. Don't shrink. But also: be nice.)

• Do the scary thing. (You never know. Take the trip. Bite off more than you can chew.)

• Don't take yourself too seriously. (You can get happy in the same pants you got mad in.)

• Be yourself. (Don't be a second-rate banana when you're a first-rate peach.)

And here's what struck me most: these aren't just life lessons. They're the foundation of how the best women in hospitality actually lead. Our industry runs on warmth, presence, intuition, and the ability to read a room — skills most of us learned at the kitchen table long before we learned them in a boardroom. The mom who taught you to be kind raised a hotelier who turns first-time guests into regulars. The mom who told you to stand up for yourself raised the woman closing the deal. The mom who said "eat first" raised the leader who knows that taking care of her team is the whole job.

If there's a unifying philosophy of hospitality leadership, maybe it's this: lead with warmth, move with intention, and never underestimate the power of a good snack.

One more thing

My mom turns 96 on June 3rd. If "this too shall pass" is the line that shaped me, the lesson she's lived is even better: keep going. Stay curious. Show up. Be social. Enjoy life. Blow out the candles.

She's still teaching me. And I'm still listening.

Your turn 💌

The thread keeps going and I can't get enough. What's the best line your mom (or any mother figure) ever gave you? Send it my way (emily@hertelier.com) — maybe we need to do another article!?!

And to all the moms and daughters reading this — the working moms, the new moms, the bonus moms, the moms-to-be, the daughters who still call their moms every Sunday, the daughters who wish they still could, and the women carrying mom energy for everyone around them — happy Mother's Day. You're doing more than anyone knows.

Now go eat first. Then solve the problem. 🍑